Barf-o-rama (or how my dog is like Houdini)

June 12, 2007

I love my little mutt. She is mostly a good girl. But since she got over her fear of going down uncarpeted stairs I’ve been facing an unusual challenge. The problem: the cat box is in the basement and she loves dining at the Kitty Buffet (we’ve since quit French kissing; you wonder why I don’t have a boyfriend).

To stop her, I started with a child safety gate. I put a chair on the other side of the gate so the cats wouldn’t have much of a leap. That worked for a while. Then the dog started knocking the gate down (she weighs about 20 pounds). I secured the gate better. Somehow, she still was getting to the other side by magically jumping over it (I say this because the bitch can’t find the strength to jump on my bed at night). So today, I put a god damned obstacle course in front of the gate and she still got through (cat poop must taste reallllly good). Now I’m pissed. To add insult to injury, she decided to throw up her latest feast on my bedroom floor. I’m quick to puke so this wasn’t good. I’m gagging and thinking “how am going to clean this up?” No problem. It was so good that she ate it again (continued gagging sounds).

Mother says the easy solution would be to raise the cat box off the floor. That makes too much sense. I’m not giving up. I will stop her.

(BTW, the picture above is not of an actual cat box.  It is the ever  so appetizing “Cat Box Cake” (more gagging).  You can find the recipe here.)


7 Responses to “Barf-o-rama (or how my dog is like Houdini)”

  1. QuakerJono Says:

    Just more proof that your average small dog is far more clever than your average child.

    Another suggestion might be to invest in one of those automatic cat box thingys. You know the ones, where after kitty daintily steps out of that place where things happen that we’d just as soon forget about, a robotic arm sweeps through the soiled soil, raking any little temptations safely into an easily disposable catch bin. A friend of mine swears hers is a god-send. Plus, now nobody has to deal with kitty’s shit.

    And nice picture, dude. I’m going to assume those are leeches and, if they’re not, we can just keep that to ourselves, m’kay?

  2. John in IL Says:

    She’s a terrier mix, so yes she is very smart. She outsmarts me at every turn.

    I bought one of those robot cat boxes. The robot was lazy (it missed a lot of shit) and the cats hated it (they chose other places to poop). Try selling a used cat box on eBay.

    I’m going to assume those are leeches and, if they’re not, we can just keep that to ourselves, m’kay?

    Leeches, no. Tootsie rolls, yes. It’s a cake(that I’ll happily leave out in the rain)!

  3. QuakerJono Says:

    THAT’S a CAKE!?!

    Well, I know SOMEONE who isn’t going to win this cycle of Top Chef.

  4. Jamie Says:

    I could SO have done without the picture in this post. I have three dogs and two cats and the litter box problem is familiar enough, believe me.

    The worst part is that the dogs come to lick your face when they’re done eating.

  5. […] those of you who thought the cat box cake wasn’t gross enough, I bring you this […]

  6. Tesshin Says:

    Whoa… Yummy cake. I made one, and it was GOOD. Despite the looks XD

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